Happy New Year to all of my readers!  I am a bit clumsy on the keyboard because my fingers are still somewhat swollen from being out in the cold; today I resigned myself to fate and went into town.

After coffee I stopped by the local entrepreneurship place, Community Futures.  I have been there three times so far, and while I appreciate what little help they have provided me with, have been experiencing severe communication difficulties with them.  They are, as I understand it, a taxpayer funded group which is supposed to support entrepreneurs in the community; however, their programs cost money.  One thing that a lot of people don’t understand is that when you have a regular job, they will often pay for personal development seminars and whatnot; this is not the case if you are on a fixed income, unfortunately, which is actually a really bad thing considering the blows to your self confidence and social skills that being unemployed for long periods has.

I asked to speak to a female mentor or consultant since the last few times I have been there I have had difficulty getting the men there to take me seriously enough to even look at my portfolio, and because apparently they have some problem with the writing moniker Doctrine Dominatrix.  Yeah.  Too bad.  I earned that name, and I quite like the freedom it provides me, not to mention the fact that I write for a very targeted audience, and if the name disturbs them, so be it.

I was thrown out.  Literally, a man came around to the receptionist’s side and said “I’ll have to ask you to leave.”  I have been there three times; once to discuss turning my pirate show on Facebook into a legit radio station; they basically ignored me and six months later a radio station opened in town; then I asked for help with giving a presentation before I went to Magdalene House — that went well actually — and last time, I tried to show him my portfolio and ask for help developing a business plan.  He refused to even look at my stuff and I insulted me basically when he said “If you aren’t willing to learn how to write a business plan I can’t help you.”

If I didn’t want to write a business plan, I wouldn’t have been there.  He didn’t listen to me, and definitely didn’t give me the opportunity to even discuss business plan development.

Today he threw me out because I am female?  What?  I’m…  I’m confused.  Seriously.  I went in, said hello, and asked the receptionist if there was a female representative or consultant or mentor available for an appointment, and I got thrown out.

I even confirmed loudly enough for the office to hear that I was in fact, being thrown out for the crime of asking to speak to a female representative.  For essentially going about my work.  What the actual hell.  I managed to not lose my cool until I was in the foyer, at which point I referred to him as a complete piece of shit, I believe.  I’m not quite sure what I said, I was not happy.

A frequently misunderstood aspect of my life is that often people think that I am incredibly conceited; this is not the case at all actually; I am just aware that I live a very awkward life, and I am a very adorably awkward person.  I recognize that people who have other jobs do just as valid work as I do, and have skills that I don’t have, and experiences that I don’t have.  Unfortunately, often times they don’t seem to reciprocate with me, and …  well..  we get what we had here……  A Failure To Communicate

So then I went in and stopped to talk to the MLA, who is a female, and her assistant.  I really enjoyed my visit; it was nice to speak to a woman in public service actually.  I told her about sewage to oil and how oil divestment and peace brokering fit into an Article 5 decision, which was really quite strange, I must admit, and how combating human trafficking, oil divestment, and fair trade seemed like the most logical solution for peace brokering.

I also stopped by the lingerie shop and talked to the lady there about fair trade underwear online.  We talked about some of the truly beautiful pieces I’ve found, like the gold silk with drop jewels I found online for like 54 pounds UK.  Or these really cute ones.  She looked really interested, and I am excited.

I filled out a job application online with the Chamber of Commerce today and emptied the books out of my trunk.

New coin, new life.